The Warship’s School
by TwinklingLane
Summary: [HUMAN HIGH SCHOOL AU] At Uminokaze Girls’ High School, everyone would have lived their own life peacefully if a certain Akagi didn’t created a chat on the school’s social network.
1. Message Series 1

**I decided to change the story because I always wanted to do a Human School AU and because I didn't liked the story before, because it was cringe... Oh wait : I am still cringe.**

_Akagi added « too much people to cite all of them » in the chat._

_Akagi renamed the chat : « Uminokaze High School's Chat »._

_Akagi renamed almost everyone excepted some people because their name or nickname was already a warship's._

**Akagi**

@everyone

Sorry for bothering everyone here, but I created a chat so us, the Uminokaze High School students would be able to talk to each other even if we are outside of the school !

**Enterprise**

« clap clap intensifies »

**Akagi**

Thanks, thanks.

**Pennsylvania**

Is the Student Council President aware of that ?

**Oklahoma**

Yes, she is !

**Avrora**

Yes, I am !

**Nagato**

Akagi...

We are in dorms, you know ?

**Akagi**

...

I know, you didn't had to say that.

And remember that we are in six different dorms...

**Fiji**

Six ?! I thought it was only two...

By the way, you forgot to add the 1st Years.

**Akagi**

oh shit oh fuck

**Enterprise**

s word

f word

**Akagi**

Remove your hat

Remove your socks

And shut your mouth.

_Akagi added the first year students_.

**Jean Bart**

Enlève ton chapeau

Enlève tes chaussettes

Et ferme ta gueule.

**Dunkerque**

Learning bad words to little childs is bad, Jean...

_Jean Bart deleted three messages._

**Jean Bart**

It was in the wrong chat, sorry.

I was added only now so... I mistook the two chats.

And it's not my hobby to follow rules, but getting a hour of school detention the first month would get my parents mad at me.

**Pennsylvania**

At least, you realized you wrote something bad.

**Hiryū**

Gay

**Z1**

Gay

**Ark Royal**

Gay

**Ise**

Why is everyone spamming « Gay » in the chat ?

**Hyūga**

BIG SIS DON'T FOLLOW THEM

FOR EVERYONE'S SAKE PLS DON'T FOLLOW THEM

**Ise**

PotaTOES.

**Hyūga**

F word.

**Jean Bart**

We lost them in an other word.

I mean world.

**Soryū**

Hiryū, swear again and you will sleep outside the dorm.

**Hiryū**

Fucking bullshit.

**Z1**

Fucking bullshit.

**Shigure**

Fucking bullshit.

**Ark Royal**

Holy shit oh fucker.

Oh fuck.

_Ark Royal deleted three comments._

**Ark Royal**

I need to leave the chat and turn off my phone a few moments, I need to calm down and be more disciplined.

**Pennsylvania**

Ok.

NO NO NO NO WHY ARE YOU GOING TO MUTSUKI'S ROOM WITH A WHIP ?!

**Tennessee**

WHA-

**Hermes**

I have a wHOLE CARD SET IF YOU NEEDED SOME HELP

**Hornet**

OH SHIT SHE'S COMING-

HIDE YOUR KIDS HIDE YOUR WIVES

**Jamaica**

/insert a song named « Run » here/

**Pennsylvania**

WE CAUGHT HER WE CAUGHT HER-

Oh nevermind it was Nevada.

F word.

**Minneapolis**

Fuck.

**Nevada**

Pennsylvania.

You will have to refund a new protection glass for me.

I'm literally writing this thing with a broken protection glass and I am pretty sure I will cut myself wi

I did it, guys.

**Pennsylvania**

did you saw ark ?

**Scharnhorst**

In your ass, third door to the right.

**Pennsylvania**

Siriusly ?

/cough/ Seriously ?

**Scharnhorst**

Joke, she is in the showers.

**Hood**

Now that you say this...

I am going to verify it, wait a minute.

She's here. With that little girl.

**Hammann**

I HATE lolicon jokes.

Just finish it ASAP.

**Pennsylvania**

SHE FINISHED IN THE JAIL

**Hammann**

THE LOLICON JAIL

**Z1**

YEEEEEEEEEET !

Scheiße.

**Akagi**

CAN EVERYONE PLEASE STOP SWEARING IN THIS CHAT

**Chicago**

/moans/ Yamete, yamete kudasai~ Aaaah~

**Zuikaku**

I NEED TO BLEACH MY EYES

MY EYES AAAAAARGH

**Northampton**

CHICAGO STOP

**Yamashiro**

... What does « moan » means ?

**Pennsylvania**

FUCK

FUCK

FUCK

I'LL BAN EVERYONE HERE

**Akagi**

It's me who take care of this chat.

And I'll do it...

_Akagi banned everyone for a period of three days for Pennsylvania's sake._


	2. Message Series 2

**Ise**

I swear : if I can comment here again, I will laugh.

I am going to laugh.

/Ise laughing during ten hours/

**Zuikaku**

Tutorial : How to cure sadness.

1: Just listen to this music.

/inserts a link here/

**Ise**

You mean, this music ?

/insert an other link/

**Zuikaku**

Senpai, you literally broke my joke...

**Ise**

To cure sadness, I listen to San Diego's songs.

Her songs are so energetic, I love to listen to them !

**Zuikaku**

You have weird tastes in music, senpai...

**Ise**

You really think that ?

Something is wrong in her musics ?

**Zuikaku**

I think it's only in her live prestations...

**Ise**

I see, I see !

@Enterprise

Come here and suggest a music !

**Enterprise**

/insert the same link/

**Akagi**

Stop auto-sucking yourself

**Enterprise**

What ?

**Akagi**

No... Nothing !

_Akagi deleted a comment._

**Ark Royal**

Everyone ?

@everyone

I found last year's photobook, with the pictures and some quotes coming from us ! Anyone wants me to cite the best citations ?

**Nevada**

Please no.

**Pennsylvania**

Don't even dare to.

**Ise**

Something's wrong with this book ??

**Nevada**

Nooo, really ? It just contains a bunch of insults :D

**Ark Royal**

So...

/a few pictures of the said photobook/

**Jean Bart**

Some quotes are interesting...

I already planned mine.

But I won't spoil, parce que Richelieu a dit une fois : « Spoiler, c'est mal. »

**Massachusetts**

Lol you wrote in French

**Jean Bart**

As the great bard said once :

« Who cares about if I WRITE IN FRENCH OR NOT- »

And I think that in this school, for the Class Picture who will be for the photobook, we will have to be disguised, but for the Official Class Picture, we will have to look decent, right ?

**Ise**

I think.

You see, my brain resets the last day of school and I start a new saving session the first day of school, so...

**Jean Bart**

No, I can't see.

And why there's two kinds of class pictures ? Like...

IT'S NOT LOGIC.

**Bunker Hill**

I saw some quotes and...

How those pictures weren't reported ?

There's literally « fuck » every 10 quotes...

**Nevada**

Don't ask the logic of this chat.

It's weirder than the humanity itself.

**Bunker Hill**

I... I see...

**Ise**

I think the most vulgar one, according to you all is : « I will fuck you with a sausage, Enterprise. »

**Hyūga**

It's Akagi who wrote this...

**Akagi**

Wha-

NO, I SWEAR IT WASN'T ME

**Nevada**

We have proofs.

**Akagi**

YOU'RE RIGHT

IT WAS ME WHO WROTE THIS

I was angry after her because she had a better costume than me, so I wrote this.

**Laffey**

... /buuurp/

I am going to sleep.

**Hyūga**

At this hour ?!

**Laffey**

I am tired... Zzzz...

_A few days later..._

**Ise**

THIS YEAR'S CLASS PICTURE WAS SO FUN !

**Hyūga**

The one who had a banana costume... Please give me an authograph.

**Nevada**

/authograph/

**Hyūga**

Thanks.

**Jean Bart**

This year, the quotes are...

**Ise**

Bad ? Wrong ? THEY ARE LITERALLY THE FUNNIEST QUOTES I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE !

**Jean Bart**

Hmm... Perhaps NO.

And I remembered myself about the Class Pictures in my ancient schools.

In Elementary School, it was around November, and we were aware of the date, so just that day, we came at school with cool clothes and we took the picture, but in Middle School...

It was during the first week of school and in first year of Middle School, we weren't aware of that, so...

We all looked like pieces of sh*t during the class picture. I still have the picture of Richelieu's face during her class picture of her first year of Middle School because it was JUST the ONLY day she didn't took care of her hairstyle and look because : « [she] had PE. »

**Nevada**

The person who wrote : « /some swearing in Japanese/ » please appear on this chat.

**Jean Bart**

Nevada, it's bad to learn to little childs how to swear in Japanese...

**Jamaica**

The person who wrote this won't appear magically.

Because there's literally the names after the quote.

**Nevada**

Oh, you're right.

Sorry, I am half-asleep after spending a day in a banana costume... I literally prepared a cowboy costume for it, and then, Oklahoma almost broke the door of my bedroom, gave me this banana costume, and took the cowboy one... to give it to Maryland.

And yes, I am still writing with the broken protection screen... Good night.

**Ise**

Good night !

_In the middle of the night..._

**Pennsylvania**

I forgot about the protection screen.


	3. School Series 1

Today, in the 3-A classroom, everyone seemed to be bored. Some of the girls were sleeping, some other girls were working, and some girls were trying to find something who would cure boredom. Until they heard the door being opened.

-I have a question to ask !

-Who wants to listen to her ?

Almost no one raised their hand excepted one person. The Class Representative.

-The Class Rep raised her hand. We can listen to her.

The « unknown » girl quietly... I mean, LOUDLY coughed, before starting to speak.

-So... Did anyone saw my schoolbag ?

-Hmm... Yeah. Saw it in a tree.

-What the...

The girl leaved the room, her steps being heard in the whole classroom.

-Who was she ?

-Ise, from the class 3-B.

-I see, I see !

-Hmm ? Something happened ?

Arizona, who has her head on Nevada's lap slowly opened her eyes.

-Since when you were here, Arizona ?!

-Hmm... Probably since six o'clock... I slept on the sofa and... Something is wrong ?

Arizona, who didn't realized that she ended up to sleep on some very comfortable thighs, looked at her classmates, a bit shocked. The only one thing she felt was her head being slowly petted.

-Don't worry, don't worry...

-Hm ? Ne... vada ? Eeeh ?!

_A few times later, at the 3-B's classroom... _

-Big sis ?! What happened to you ?!

-My bag... It was on a tree...

-Who is the culprit ?

\- I don't know ! I just asked where was my bag !

-Now that you all talk about it... It's true that I saw something on a tree...

-Why you said nothing, Yamashiro-chan ?!

-Hmm... I thought it was a cat.

Everyone facepalmed in the room. As the German girls were in second or first year, the third year B's class was fully Japanese.

-Mikasa ? Nagato ?

Nagato jumped of her chair, while Mikasa just looked at her classmates.

-Ise... Stop eating sweets at school...

-Want some, Hyūga ?

-No thanks.

The gray-haired girl while taking the small pocket full of candies out of her sister's hands, before hiding it, and taking a bottle of water from her schoolbag.

-Here, drink this.

_During this time, at the 2-B's classroom... _

-Dunkerque's crepes are so delicious !

Dunkerque took the habitude to bring homemade food at school, so her classmates and the other students could eat them. Today, she did some crepes for her classmates.

-I'm glad that Jean Bart gave the recipe to me...

-Jean Bart... Gave this recipe to you ?

-Yes. She got it while she lived in Casablanca.

-I see...

Tirpitz looked at Dunkerque, before she saw something coming out of the French girl's bag.

-What's that thing in your bag ?

-No... Nothing, said the red-eyed student while pulling the thing back in her bag.

_After the school..._

-Here's your crepes.

-And here's... This thing I made by myself !

-Oh, um... Thanks, Ise.

Ise took the crepes and started to eat them, while Dunkerque started to look at the gift she got.

-It was a work I made during my first year of school. It was taking too much place in my room, so I gave it to you...

-Oh, um... Thanks.

-And also, you're always kind towards me, and you always give me food without wanting something in return, so... I decided that I would give you something !

And the two girls started to talk until they were stopped by Nevada.

-Wait a second... A planet is missing... Mercury, Venus, Earth, March, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune... Where is Pluto ?

-Pluto... Isn't a planet anymore.

-So it was true...

And Nevada leaves the two girls.


	4. Message Series 3

**Maryland**

I'm angry.

**Oklahoma**

Something is wrong ?

**Maryland**

My headphones legit said "fuck Mary's rights"

They didn't charged.

**Hyūga**

Headphone squad, rise up.

**Ashigara**

/rises up/

**Akagi**

AirPods squadron, wake up.

**Zuikaku**

/wakes up/

**Enterprise**

/wakes up/

**Zuikaku**

Finally, no.

/goes back to sleep/

**Maryland**

Can't believe y'all are broke only because you bought AirPods.

**Ise**

I only bought some for the memes.

I gave them to the trash.

**Hornet**

Oh, I found some in the trash yesterday !

Wait... What the f...

WERE THOSE AIRPODS YOURS-

**Ise**

Yes, why ?

**Hornet**

OH FUCK-

I USED THEM FOR... research purposes.

I used them because I wanted AirPods because I bought a phone without the thingy for the...

Fuck, I forgot how to speak English.

**Nevada**

It happens to me, sometimes, I talk in French.

**Oklahoma**

WHQT YOURE FR'ECH-

WAIT YOU CAN SPEAK FRENCH ?!

sasuga bee-San !

/nee-san.

**Nevada**

Yep.

And I am sure Enterprise can't.

**Enterprise**

Bonjour Amour. Bonjour Amour. Bonjour Amour.

**Nevada**

Vous vous appelez comment ? Eddy-Malou, le premier savant de toute la République Démocratique du Congo, EDDY-MALOU. E double D Y trait d'union M A L O U. Ça veut dire imposer la force vers l'ovalium, c'est à dire l'estime du savoir. Les gens qui connaissent beaucoup de choses, incristaliser, imposer iiiiinnn... intentioner ça dans toute la République Démocratique du Congo pour que nous puissions avoir la congolexicomatisation des lois du marché propres au Congolais je vous prie.

**Jean Bart**

Wow.

**Hyūga**

Big sis, I know what you planned to do.

Please don't even think about this.

**Ise**

Hey everyone ! My name is Kaoru Hakaze. I was born on November 3rd, and I am the student of the... Yumenosaki Gakuen High School. I am a senior student, and my blood type is B and my class... My class is 3-A. That's pretty much, hehe, thank you.

**Jean Bart**

What the...

**Enterprise**

終わりだ ！

I am not really sure about the writing, but I hope I am right !

**Jean Bart**

Can everyone please talk in only 1 language ? I am lost.

I am going to talk in Arabic, y'all will be s h o c k e d.

**Maryland**

No one is talking about my headphones.

I am s h o c k e d.

**Oklahoma**

I tried to enter into the Gacha fandom, but I only see depressive people...

**Maryland**

Or 12-years old kiddos who re-did Fifty Shades of Gray.

**Atago**

Ara ara, they are even not legal, yet they are already doing that ?

**Maryland**

I mean : A Hundred Shades of Ara Ara Big Sis Atago nee-sama please step on me with your heels and what the fuck is this is this fandom full of degenerates.

**Nagato**

It has been 3000 years...

You finally saw the truth, Maryland...

**Akagi**

Can you all please stop spamming here ?

I am switching between two chats full of degenerates like you all.

Glad no one I actually know is here.

**Nagato**

Unless... ??


	5. Message Series 4

**Akagi**

Small question, but who the fuck is the person who put the TV extremely loud ?

Especially since there's a cringe song playing right now.

**Jamaica**

K-pop isn't cringe.

**Akagi**

It's cringe.

Just look at the fangirls' reactions.

YOU. WILL. NEVER. BE. ABLE. TO. MARRY. THOSE. IDOLS.

**Taihō**

And so, you will never marry the Commander.

**Akagi**

Die, please.

**Taihō**

No.

**Akagi**

Don't pretend to be shocked if you find me in your room...

**Amagi**

Akagi, please calm down

**Akagi**

BIG SISTER ?!

**Kaga**

Joke. It's me, big sis.

**Sheffield**

And don't pretend to be shocked if you find Jamaica in my Roon.

room

We are roommates now.

**Akagi**

Why ?

**Sheffield**

Couldn't sleep because of Southampton.

And technically, Jamaica accepted to switch rooms with her.

But I don't know if Fiji was against that...

**Fiji**

Eh ? You thought I was angry ?

As long as my little sister is happy, then it's fine !

**Akashi**

Jamaica please roll over me with your bike, nya~

**Jamaica**

Sorry, but I don't do that.

Killing is technically bad.

**Akashi**

Oh yeah...

Almost forgot that we were in a school AU created by me and Long Island...

**Long Island**

Who's spamming right now ???

**Akagi**

Oh fuck she's angry

**Long Island**

Calm down, I just loST AGAINST ISE AT SAKURA KART, YOU-

**Jamaica**

Oh, you finally did that fight on Sakura Kart ?

I am good at kart games, can I fight the winner ?

**Akagi**

We were only talking about the TV...

Now answer... WHO THE FUCK IS WATCHING THAT SILLY SUPERHERO ANIME FOR MY FUCKING SAKE ANSWER !!!

**Roon**

Taihō

**Taihō**

Jun'yō

**Jun'yō**

Roon

**Roon**

...

_Later..._

**Ark Royal**

Y'all, I peed myself in front of the WC.

I washed the dirt and took a bath, but I am still salty because of that.

**Exeter**

So it was you-

**York**

Wait, you can say the p word here-

**Ark Royal**

This story is M rated, so technically I can say it.

**Akashi**

Sorry for the commanders who accidentally got some rainbows coming out of their mouths while reading this, nyaaa~ !

**Kaga**

Oh, it happened to me once.

Excepted that I was about to remove my clothes, and that I was over the thing for the W.C.

**Hiryū**

Oof-

**Akagi**

CHICHED NEOODABE SOUFP SUT THE FIFNCIK P.

**Jamaica**

And it was you who said that no swearing into the chat.

Or it was Pennsylvania ? Nevermind.

Anyway, you said the F word.

**Ise**

f u c k

Akagi said f u c k.

**Sheffield**

Oh, thank you for the translation, it was useless.

**Pennsylvania**

Ark Royal asked me to make you all do a challenge : write heterosexuality with your eyes closed.

If you can't, then you're gay.

**Ark Royal**

Excepted you, me and Nevada, everyone leaved.

So... heterosexuality.

Fuck.

**Pennsylvania**

Heterosevuality

**Nevada**

heterosexyaliry

**Ark Royal**

This test is bullshit.

**Mutsuki**

heterosexuality.

... what does it mean ?

**Ark Royal**

... SHE SAW IT-


	6. MessageSeries5

**Akagi**

Bad news : No episode of Azur Lane until March 2020...

**Enterprise**

Eh ? But... aren't you dead ?

**Akagi**

Aight guys I'm boutta head out.

**Zuikaku**

NO ! YOU WON'T TAKE MY VIRGINITY !

**Kaga**

You're not in the subject, dumbass.

**Ise**

Ok, so, no screentime for me until March, huh ?

For once that I was one of the main characters...

**Z1**

You're not on the site, you're not the main character !

**Ise**

Fuck you. At least, I'm on Crosswave... Unlike you.

**Warspite**

/despacito starts playing in the corner/

**Nevada**

When the eleventh episode will be released, I'm giving you more extra food. I hope your stomach is ready, Enterprise...

**Enterprise**

No.

**Borg**

At least, I got to appear !

**Isokaze**

Me too !

**Kaga**

Where ?

**Isokaze**

The moment where the Mutsuki-class destroyers were running in the streets : if you zoom a lot when you have a view on the commercial street, you can see a green-haired girl in black clothes : it's me !

**Kaga**

oh. but you know i was the main focus, right ?

**Jean Bart**

I STILL DIDN'T GOT SCREENTIME BUT MASSACHUSETTS GOT ?! RICHELIEU, I SWEAR THAT IF YOU APPEAR BEFORE ME, I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU AND POOP IN YOUR NECK-

**Kaga**

calm down.

**Massachusetts**

I hope you're having fun with the shipwreck at El Jadida.

**Jean Bart**

... I'm going to bitch you the fuck up.

**Saint Louis**

Recently, to cope with the lack of screentime in the anime towards the Iris Libre, I started to watch some séries policières.

Most of the time, the main dude has grey hair and a husky voice.

**Ise**

Grey hair...

Husky voice...

... HYUUGA I KNEW IT-

_Hyuuga has left the chat._

_Hyuuga was added to the chat._

**Hyuuga**

BIG SIS I SWEAR I WAS WITH YOU SINCE THE BEGGINING-

**Ise**

liAR

**Hyuuga**

I SWEAR I'M NOT SOME OLD WEIRD DUDE-

**Jean Bart**

At the same time, the maximum of manly charisma you can reach is Lycéenne vegan féministe qui manifeste pour sécher les cours et qui écoute de la k-pop-level charisma.

**Hyuuga**

Ok, boomer.

**Jean Bart**

I got lauched in 1940, it doesn't function.

**Massachusetts**

« Completed in 1949 ».

**Jean Bart**

Ok, I admit being a boomer.

But next time, you're dead.

**Ise**

Ok boomer.

_A few moments later._

**Ise**

OK THERE'S SOMETHING WEIRD FOLLOWING ME-

I THINK IT'S JEAN

HELP HELP HELP

**Souryuu**

WHERE ARE YOU ?

_Jean Bart has left the chat._

**Ise**

I'M RUNNING TO YOUR ROOM.

I'M ONLY WEARING A LARGE T-SHIRT AND SHORT-

**Souryuu**

So you're in pajamas, huh...

WAIT YOU DON'T WEAR ANY UNDERWEAR ?!

**Ise**

Usually, I'm full commando mode. I thought you knew that ?

And don't ask about what happens when I have my period-

**Souryuu**

STOP TEXTING AND RUN YOU FUCKING BITCH-

**Ise**

MY. NOT YOU.

Souryuu

DON'T EXPOSE U-

**Souryuu**

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE ?!

**Hiryuu**

WAIT BIG SIS ISN'T A VIRGIN-

**Hyuuga**

WHAT THE FUCK

**Hiryuu**

ARE YOU TWO DATING-?!

**Hyuuga**

I FUCKING KNEW IT-

THOSE TIMES WHERE YOU WEREN'T HERE

AND THAT I HEARD WEIRD SOUNDS...

I THOUGHT IT WAS AKAGI, BUT IT WAS YOU ?!

**Akagi**

No, it was me. Or Taihou, since your room is next to hers.

**Hyuuga**

Ok, I should stop stressing out.

It's always like that since I changed rooms...

_Discussion Hyuuga/Hiryuu._

**Hiryuu**

Hyuuga...

_/picture/_

**Hyuuga**

It's NSFW... delete it.

**Hiryuu**

You liar.

You're just shocked because it's... your big sister ?

**Hyuuga**

It's not that.

**Hiryuu**

I know when you're lying.

I watched you sleeping once.

**Hyuuga**

what-

I swear I'm going to wake up from this weird dream.

Akagi is dead, Jean Bart is a boomer, Ise and Souryuu are fucking dating and you watch me sleeping ?? Let me laugh a second.

**Hiryuu**

It's real.

**Hyuuga**

Wait, why are you in my rooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooododjkdsnbsbfhfjdkapapdknfnbdhzjdkfopfpsnabdidkoffp

Wait. What you have done... It... felt good.

**Hiryuu**

What I have done ?

**Hyuuga**

You came in my room and... um... we kissed... and... we did like our elder sisters... we... touched each others body... skin to skin, you know ?

**Hiryuu**

Now it's me who's daydreaming ? Let me laugh.

I didn't... why I am wet ?

Thanks, I remember now.

**Hyuuga**

Pinch your cheek, you will see it's real.

Question... Are we dating now... ?

**Hiryuu**

Stop that, you're going to be... romantic...

You're saying this... only because we had sex once ?

**Hyuuga**

I'm not getting romantic, bro.

And it wasn't even sex, you just touched the upper part of my body under my clothes while French-kissing me.

**Hiryuu**

Don't call me bro.

And... You have nice taste in bras.

**Hyuuga**

It wasn't your main focus, though.

You preferred to touch my butt... You perverted dragon.

**Hiryuu**

At the same time...

It's huge... So are your... br... brea... YOUR HUGE TIDDIES !

**Hyuuga**

You're embarrassing me...

Anyway, I checked my big sis' phone.

Didn't found any embarrassing picture, but in the private chat with Souryuu...

They like to role play.

**Hiryuu**

I saw it too.

And my big sister has her in her _very _private contacts too.

She calls her « Darling » with an emoji heart at the end, while Ise just called her « Souryuu-chan » with the same heart emoji.

Once, I remember big sis went to a camp, and she was separated from Ise during two weeks.

I can only say that they were lusting _hard_ for each other's body.

**Hyuuga**

I'm more surprised that Ise ended up with her.

Thought she would be more with Long Island, or Nagato.

Oh, and that explain why big sis' bedsheets smelled like hormones...

And also, I sent back big sis' phone, so I can't see anymore.

**Hiryuu**

You want me to tell you about some parts ?

Even if it will ruin the image you have of your sister ?

**Hyuuga**

Do it.

**Hiryuu**

Well... I know she likes uniforms. Especially maids and nurses. And she prefers tights over thigh-high socks.

And she once confessed about wanting to mark Souryuu's whole body so she wouldn't show any single part of skin to anybody.

And well... Ise is a HUGE bottom. I heard them making love once, and she was the loudest out of the two.

**Hyuuga**

Surprised of that.

And you listen to your sister fucking with somebody. Creepy.

And after that, you pretend to be innocent. Pfft.


	7. MessageSeries6

**Akagi**

After what happened those last days...

It's time to expose everyone's relationships.

WHO ARE DATING WHO : THE GAME !

**Prinz Eugen**

You're drunk ?

**Akagi**

No. Just wanted to start the hood.

**Hood**

You mean « mood », right ?

**Akagi**

Fuck you.

**Bismarck**

I swear I saw more fanarts of me and Hood than you and her.

And also @PrinzEugen @PrinceofWales, expose yourselves.

**Jean Bart**

Alrighty, gays.

@Enterprise x @Belfast

@Washington x @SouthDakota

@Zuikaku x @Alabama

@Jamaica x @Sheffield

**Sheffield**

Not of this in my household. I'm straighter than the lines you do with your ruler.

**Jean Bart**

Ok, here I was wrong.

@Richelieu x @God

**Ise**

You called me ?

**Haruna**

Why the heck we can access your account when we put @God ?

Why the fuck it's Akashi now ?!

**Shiranui**

She accepted to help me and Akashi with the business.

She is now a mod.

**Ise**

Money is important, so spend it on food and booze !

**Souryuu**

Dude I'm spending my money on lingerie and maid costumes and all you want is booze ?!

**Ise**

I fell into the sangria when I was a child.

**Hyuuga**

@JeanBart @Massachusetts ... You two hide things to the public, huh ?

**Jean Bart**

I SWEAR TO MY ANCESTOR'S HEAD THAT I AM NOT GAY

**Centaur**

Ok... boomer ?

**Jean Bart**

_/uno card "reverse"/_

**Centaur**.

Oh no.

**Jean Bart**

Well, in every case, we are all going to die because of that Chinese virus, so.

_Yat Sen, Ning Hai and five other persons left the chat._

**Formidable**

What the fuck.

_Formidable deleted one comment._

**Ise**

Fuck I'm not a virgin anymore.

**Long Island**

But I am. So I'm gonna survive since I'm a virgin NEET.

And I saw that the people who aren't young but are younger than 25 years old, so technically, only Shikikan and Nevada are going to die.

**Nevada**

Liar, I saw that a baby got the coronavirus.

**Jean Bart**

« Tout ce qui est sur Internet est vrai. Oui c'est vrai. Dabidubidubidabidibou. » - Antoine Daniel

Zuikaku

You know that as long as we talk about this, Yat Sen and the others won't come back in the chat riiiiight ?

Shoukaku

there was akagi singing « Happy Birthday » for one of the saddest days in the history in the middle of the lesson she got scolded out lmfao.

Akagi

... youknowyouregoingtofuckingdieyouknowbitch.


	8. MessageSeries7

**Jamaica**

Anyone is interested in talking into k-pop ?

**Akagi**

DON'T MENTION THAT, THE WEEBS ARE ABOUT TO FUCKING LEAVE-

**Shoukaku**

Stan LOONA.

**Akagi**

SHOUKAKU YOU FUCKING-

**Akashi**

I wanted to say something but I can't speak Korean nya~

**Enterprise**

Anyway, the torture dance is better.

**Ise**

What a fancy way to write « Easy Breezy », Grey Ghost.

**Nelson**

You amateurs.

**Enterprise**

I don't get it.

**Belfast**

It's not that good to insult people, you know ?

**Nelson**

Shut the f up.

**Enterprise**

She's even more polite than half of the « polite » girls there. I'm shocked.

**Nelson**

Ok, b.

**Belfast**

I have problems with people who use vulgar words as punctuation.

**Ise**

And I have problems with people who think more about their etiquette and if they « look good » than having fun in their lives.

**Souryuu**

So it means you're into degenerates ?

**Ise**

You're a degenerate.

I'm a degenerate.

We are all degenerates.

**Shoukaku**

lmao

_A few hours later..._

_Discussion Akagi/Kaga_

**Akagi**

Kaga... psst, Kaga.

**Kaga**

What's wrong, big sister ?

**Akagi**

... k-pop is very good. sorry I had to admit this to you.

**Kaga**

Nice for you, big sister.

**Akagi**

You aren't going to be mad at me, Kaga ?

Why did you logged off ?

???

??????

?????????

Anyway I refuse to admit to like a thing Shoukaku likes in public, so...

_Akagi deleted four comments._

_A few hours later..._

**Hyuuga**

Hey you degenerates

There's Azur Lane's 11th episode who's going to release soon, and all you think about is half-naked dancing dudes.

**Ise**

You too, you're a half-naked dancing woman.

**Grozny**

Je boirai un shot dès que quelqu'un me fera rire.

**Formidable**

Grozny, your comment is in French

**Grozny**

Crap, I've put the automatic translation in French...

**Formidable**

Wait, what ?!

Well... I should translate my sentences in Italian, then, and send them to Vitorrio Veneto.


End file.
